Ever since I embarked on my attachment to Singapore Prisons, I have done lots of soul-searching as Mr Simon calls it, and many of my beliefs, attitudes and ideals have come into question.

I've always appeared confident of my choice to do this job, but there are times when I've wavered and wondered whether I would be able to take the intensity, the crazy working hours, the constant questioning and revising my beliefs.

But there are some things that don't change.

I really want to help themhelp themselves. And I really want to help myself in the process. It's also a really challenging experience to be thrown point blank into a situation where you only have this split second to make a wise and sound judgement on what to do next. Because that's how it is as a prison officer. Always on the go. Situations arise out of the blue and you have to react and respond in the most appropriate manner. Someone shared with me today about how a prison officer helped me through his troubles within prison and also his problems outside of the prison walls with regards to his family, just by showing him appropriate concern and listening to him when he needed it. It really warmed me up and really encouraged me to think that I may really make this difference in someone's life in the future. I might not be able to help every single one of them (depending on whether they wanna help themselves) but i do know i made adifference to that single one. Just like the starfish story! Cliche, but so so true.

And as I involve myself in one day of prison psychology work, I'm more sure it's something I wanna do in the future. Not just for the Prison inmates themselves, but also for my own learning. It involves assessments, therapy, group therapy, programme, research. Just basically everything that I would wanna dwell in to see what I'll be more interested in.

Maybe the sun is starting to creep in...

But the clouds still linger.

Heard this song on my ipod just today and I never even realized I had it. It's such a typical love duet but I think it's really sweet. I used think that lyrics alone make a good song but then I realized that wouldn't make it any different from a poem or a prose passage. Then I figured maybe music itself constitutes a good song, but I've heard good melodies but really trashy lyrics. So the songs I really appreciate now are those that have music that speak with the lyrics, whether it being contradictory as of a satire, or whether complementing the message in the lyrics. I think this song really sings and sounds like it means. NIIICCCEEE.

When You tell me that You love me
I wanna call the stars down from the sky
I wanna live a day that never dies
I wanna change the world only for you
All the impossible I wanna do

I wanna hold you close under the rain
I wanna kiss your smile and feel the pain
I know what's beautiful looking at you
In the world of lies you are truth

And baby every time you touch me
I become a hero
I make you safe no matter where you are
And bring you everything you ask for
Nothing is above me
I'm shining like a candle in the dark
When you tell me that you love me